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What Are You Doing Here Last.FM?

August 5, 2010

I have been listening to the above video, Brian Pumper’s future classic, “Oh & It’s Shaved” for the better part of the last hour. Instead of doing the predictable thing and praising Larry Fishburne‘s awesome job raising of his daughter Montana, I would rather praise this effort by Mr. Pumper. He has come a long way. Pumper’s growth as an artist should be celebrated. If “Oh & It’s Shaved” is any indication, his pre-pipe session intros on his porn videos will not be automatic skips anymore. I am already looking forward to the remix. I have some artist in mind that I would like to see on the remix. Gucci Mane and Soulja Boy are givens. I would also like to see Cam’ron bless the track. Even though his fan would lose it if he participated in the DJ Khaled blessed remix, I also think Talib Kweli should be featured on the track. Doing so would complete his leap to the mainstream, and could do a lot towards making him interesting on the mic.

LastF.M: You are not fooling anyone Dash.

Dash: What do you mean? And um…what are you doing here?

LastF.M: I am hear because I scrobble where I please. Bigging up Brian Pumper, and listing those ignant rappers is not throwing me off your trail.

Dash: My trail?

LastF.M: Yes your trail. I know the truth about you.

Dash: (A Look of Confusion Engulfs his Face) What truth?

LastF.M: I know that you are secretly a 40 year old Black womyn.

Dash: (Visibly Perplexed and Shaken) And how did you come to this conclusion?

LastF.M: I analyzed your music choices. You seem to have a fondness for acts featuring men who are babyoiled, bearded, sideburned, and play horns.

Dash: My musical tastes are deeper than that.

LastF.M: Are you talking about you playing a Cam’ron station today?

Dash: Yes amongst other things. I also listen to a lot of….

LastF.M: Silence! You are just making things worse for yourself. You only like Cam’ron because you are attracted to his pink hued machismo. LastF.M can not be fooled. You have been exposed!

Dash:…I have been exposed.

One Comment leave one →
  1. Lamar Doom permalink
    August 5, 2010 9:50 pm

    the ass acne (or whatever the f*ck was going on back there) makes me so hot

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