Skip to content

Leave It All Behind

February 27, 2010

I recently came across this product:

It is called The Booty Pop, and while I am not looking to improve my rumptual aesthetics, it did get me to thinking about a problem that I have. You see I and King of The Hill’s principal character have something in common, it is not on some Bobby and Whitney ish, but it is still rather debilitating. We both are lacking in the ass department.

Generally Noassatall strikes snowbunnies and East Asians, but sometimes it strikes black males. My case is interesting because all of my siblings are working with rumps of quality. They get it from my mama. I know you are asking yourself, what makes this a problem? Well lacking ass makes sitting down for any period of time incredibly uncomfortable. When I am seated for an extended period of time, the lack of natural cushioning provided by adequate booty cheeks leaves me susceptible to having my entire lower body go to sleep. You can see why this could be dangerous. It makes driving long distances especially hairy.   The Toyota recall really hit home, even though I would not be caught dead driving a Prius, but the idea of a peddle sticking is something that could easily take me out of the game when an extended time in the cockpit momentarily leaves me paralyzed from the waist down. To be honest I have not exhausted or investigated alternatives. I am sure I could go the way of the Barbies and get a shot,or the route of the hemorrhoid sufferers and get a do-nut pad, but those solutions are unbecoming a gentleman of my bearing. So my only recourse is to make my way here:

And dedicate myself to building up my posterior the old fashioned way. It worked for Ki-Toy.

One Comment leave one →
  1. February 28, 2010 3:05 am

    C’mon that probust looks like two glazed donuts glued to her butt, or how about that candy on a piece of paper. It just looks stupid and will make you look stupid once you get dude back to your house and he reaches around there to find there is nothing to hold on to, lol. Start doing some lunges and squats to work out that “bootimus maximus”.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: